As my two long-time readers are aware (unfortunately, they say), this side of the blog, that is, the left side, if you are in here looking out, like I am, or the right side, as you are sitting there, unless, of course, you are turned around now, yelling at whomever might be bugging you, who, by the way, is not me because I’m in here looking out at you, but that’s neither here nor there inasmuch as I can’t really say I’m on the right side for the reason that I have never been right, as far as the left side of the blog is concerned, is sometimes about golf. In reality, it’s always about golf; but this isn't reality. This is the blogosphere.
In real life, I’m a lawyer. “What do lawyers do in their spare time?” you may ask yourself. And I wouldn’t answer you because you are asking yourself. And, as I tell my clients, “Answer only the question that is asked.” But since this isn’t reality, I will tell you that some lawyers play golf in their spare time. Some lawyers think they play golf in their spare time. And still others say that they play golf, but don’t. And a few lawyers read patent applications in their spare time.
As one of those very few lawyers who is multi-talented, I was perusing the USPTO website – that’s the United States Patent & Trademark Office to those in the know – and I came across a very interesting patent application that is called a “Golf Swing Tempo Measurement System.”
I certainly don't pretewnd to know what you're thinking out there, but I opine that a system that “comprises a plurality of acceleration measuring devices adapted to measure accelerations at a plurality of locations along an elongated member” does not sound like something to be used in the game of golf.
It is described as “a biofeedback system including an elongated member.” It feeds back sounds so that the “tempo of an elongated member” can be gauged. It uses “sensors to capture motion characteristics of an elongated member,” so that the “tempo” of the member can be reproduced because, get this, “controlled speed and tempo are crucial to successful, reproducible performance.”
There are times, far and few between, when I am proud to claim I am a lawyer – more so a golfer – and this, my faithful readers, is one of those rare times.
Posted by Bill at May 23, 2007 08:22 PMwho'd've thunk that golf could be so much fun? what with all the elongated member grabbing and whacking balls into holes and such. watch out for water hazards!
Posted by: tj at May 24, 2007 12:13 AMI can't believe they have the balls to try to patent this. People have been doing technical documentation of this process for a long time. Me ancestors called it a shillelagh.
Posted by: Kyle at May 24, 2007 01:27 AMI love it when you address us personally in your posts.
I'm not sure I should be reading about elongated members without my husband present.
Posted by: Anji at May 24, 2007 12:43 PM