Nothing But Love :: golf blogger

Running Out of Gas

I abashedly admit that I ran my car out of gas 10 times over a period of two three or four years. I have not done so in the last couple years. That's a good thing. I don't wait as long to fill the tank as I used to do -- I didn't fill the tank before, come to think of it -- that is, I don't wait until the low fuel light has been flashing for two days; I've actually been filling the tank when it's half full -- or half empty, according to your world view.

So, it would seem that I'm okay with the gas thing; and just when I'm starting to be okay with the gas thing, we'll all be switching to electric cars. I want mine with solar cells on the roof to re-charge the batteries. I won't ever have to worry about a fill-up again.

Of course, electric cars, like flying cars, probably won't be happening for many, many, many years, especially with our representatives in the seat of government cow-towing to the oil interests under the guise, of course, of drilling off-shore to reduce prices at the pump.

I know that everyone with but a modicum of gray matter is saying that permitting new off-shore drilling won't do anything to gasoline prices now; but let's see, I seem to recall that there was absolutely no evidence of WMD in Iraq before this stupid, stupid war for oil, but Cheney, Bush, and McCain kept up with the chant that Saddam was a bad man and all bad men have WMD until most of the populace believed the lies. I'm of the opinion that they'll say we need to open up new areas for off-shore drilling loud enough and long enough so as to convince the people in this country that it must be true -- convince the people just like Hitler, Goebbels, and Goehring and Cheney, Bush, and McCain, lest we forget.

I have to apologize because I hadn't intended to go down that off-shore oil drilling path. Oil companies are not drilling off-shore in many areas under the licenses the government has granted them already; so, why expand off-shore drilling into new places or in the Alaskan National Wildlife Refuge, where they can't drill, if there are places they can drill and don't drill?

Ask Bush; ask Cheney; ask McCain; ask Palin (not Michael -- he'd tell you the truth).

As I said, I hadn't intended to go down that off-shore oil drilling path. I'm sitting in Starbucks. I'm waiting. I'm waiting for the Jackal. I'm waiting for the Jackal to bring me the extra set of keys for the fucking car. I locked my set of keys in the car. Second time in six months.

It's not my fault. Really. It's not my fault. Really. If I say it loud enough and long enough, you'll believe it. But there is a reason I left the keys in the car.

It's the car wash. Really. It's the car wash. Really.

You see, the last time I locked the keys in the car, I was washing the car at the self-serve car wash.

This time, I was thinking about going to the self-serve car wash. See? It's not my fault. Really. It's the car wash.

Posted by Bill at August 31, 2008 11:14 PM