YOU GO GIRL! I live in an area where many people believe if you don't work a public job, you are lazy, and just don't want to work. To heck with that already! I have worked harder at being a wife, homemaker, and mom, than I ever have in any public job. This IS a full-time job. I have been unable to work a full-time public job for some time; simply because I have had to be on a different, more flexible, go at my own pace schedule. I know I have worked; and, worked hard! I have made a family for myself, a REAL home for my husband and daughter. I do work part-time now; meantime, at home, I am a full-time secretary, treasurer, cook, maid, lover, friend, mom, and pet caretaker. If more people would stay at home with their children during their young, impressionable years, we wouldn't need to have commercials about "The Family Table" because we would BE at the table with our family.

I consider that I was fortunate to be able to be with my children as they were growing up. I used to child mind too. I've observed that there are some people who don't really care who looks after their kids. Our children are the most precious things we have. I still think it's important that women have a choice.

I've known you for quite some time now and let me tell you there is no doubt that you are more accomplished, more interesting and more intelligent han most women I encounter in the workplace.

No.
Doubt.

I'll never understand why some people think you can't possibly be a feminist and choose to stay home with your children.

I am a feminist the way I am green-eyed. It's just a part of me and always has been. AND I stayed home with my child. Now that she is twelve, I look back and don't regret one second of it.

I was a stay-at-home mom by choice. And I am not the least bit sorry. I loved it.

Now I work, and love that. I have a career that I really enjoy, and, unlike many others my age, am not burned out.

I think it's important to do what you love best. Children are young for such a short time. If you want to be home - do it. And if you want to work - do it.

you make a cogent point, very persuasively. But your head is screwed on pretty damn straight, too - you're not taking your cues from the television or the neighbors. Your kids had the benefit of you being there for them, but more than that - much more, in fact: that their parents were self-possessed and self-directed. No greater lesson can be conveyed, regardless what specific direction the parents choose to take. But nationwide so many moms are in a sysiphean struggle to perform so many functions at such high levels that, if they don't destroy themselves, they alienate their family. The american family has turned into a microcosm of societal anomie. We must look to people like you, Stacy, for our guidance out of this madness.

I'm so glad you read my blog! sorry for pissing you off!

Here here! You are so totally and completely right.

They love to make you feel small when they work and you don't. Correction. They love to try and make you feel small. I love to come here and get reassurance that I've done the right thing for the past 18 years when I have done what I have needed/wanted to do. Thank you for this brilliant piece. I have to go direct another writer this way. She needs to read here and get some reassurances of her own today. :)

Smooches, Stace.

All I know is that when I say something less than nice about SAHMs, it is jealousy pure and simple. Well, maybe not pure and simple, maybe all mixed up with sadness and regret and justification and reassurance and forgiveness for cheating my only child out of a home-for-him-all-the-time-good mama. I know in my heart if I coulda, I woulda.