Nothing But Love :: golf blogger

GET YOUR OWN DAMNED BLOG!

note: shelly is a frequent visitor to the site. i've asked bill if it's ok with him if i post this. he said, "sure."

i’ve been bothered more and more by the e-mail revelation by shelly (to me) that bill's mom and dad shared personal confidences with shelly and her sister, suzy - without my permission or knowledge. i can’t help but think that this information was passed along in the same “bitch sessions” that, evidently, were commonly held after visits with me and bill and the boys. lovely.

a. these confidences were those that one shares only with those one trusts - and cares about. nice to know how tenderly and lovingly my confidence - and heart - were treated. i really do feel betrayed. MY feeling. no one has the right to judge that. no one.

b. and. these confidences were shared with people with whom my relationship is distant - at best. nice.

i made a grave error in judgment in trusting bill’s mom and dad. my mistake. shelly will - and has - argued that i NEVER trusted them and allowed them into my heart and family. she is wrong. her information comes only from bill’s mom and dad. nuff said. ask bill if you want to know how i felt about them, what i tried to do.

c. shelly was perfectly comfortable relating to me that she was told these things; she also let me know that i was a continuing source of pain to mom and dad (oh. sorry. HER mom and dad.) for these past 30 years. evidently because i was cold and distant. not only to suzy and shelly, but to mom and dad. note to self: stop calling them "mom and dad." bill and diana should do nicely.

true, i stopped trying a long time ago with the sisters. was not very nice. i’ve never been afraid to admit that. never. for a lot of reasons. evidently, suzy and shelly behaved righteously at ALL times. again - ask bill. he’s got his OWN list. but you know what the difference is here? bill - and i - NEVER talked to mom and dad about our relationship / difficulties with his sisters. we always felt that was and should have been between us (bill's sisters and bill and me) only. that it had NOTHING to do with his parents. if i felt the same about bill’s parents now as i did then, i’d say that was a mistake. that perhaps his parents should have known there were 2 sides to the thing. but - i don’t feel that same way about them. i’m having a hard time with the fact that (as i said earlier) these two (bill’s mom and dad) weren’t the people i thought they were. believe what you want, shelly; and i’ll believe what i do. you believe your parents - and you - have behaved righteously at all times. if that gives you comfort, live with it. fine with me.

and. i will say that in response to your idea that i did not allow your parents into my heart and kept them out of my family’s heart - bullshit. you were not here. you have no right to judge. but i also know that because you were not here, you’d have no way to know. the only way you COULD know is if your parents told you. which, obviously, they did not. again. the wonderful, perfect parents. not. selfish, fake, and manipulative. my opinion.

shelly, your comments are not welcome here. if you have something to say - i’m sure much, much better than i ever could - get your own fucking blog and quit visiting mine.

and. as i told you, i’m not interested in trying to unravel 30 years of knots. i am not. you’ve shown yourself not to be worth the effort. yes, you have. as i told you, i could have done without the knowledge of the betrayal of your parents. but you hoarded that and let it loose like a little gift to me. i probably am better off.

Posted by Stacey at October 2, 2003 12:52 PM