October 16, 2003

Three Conversations

Last Night:
Bill: Could you fit a table for seven in any time on Staurday night?
Hostess: I think that will be okay, but let me check with 'Stino. (Exit Left.)
Waiter (passing by): Is your son the 4-time state champion wrestler at St. Edward by any chance.
Bill: No.
Stace: Our son is the silver-medal winning editor of Flight, the St. Edward literary magazine, one of only 48 awarded nationwide.
Hostess (returning): Six o'clock -- table for seven.
Waiter (sucking up): And will the national silver-medal award winner be joining us?

This Morning:
Bill: The cop says you went over the center line a number of times.
Client: I don't remember that.
Bill: If you didn't drive erratically, the cop couldn't stop you.
Client: Really, sir?
Bill: Yeah, really. Anyone with you when you got stopped?
Client: Yes, sir. Three friends were with me.
Bill: Can we bring them in to testify that you didn't go over the center line?
Client: No. They were all wasted, too.
Bill: Worse than you were?
Client: Fuck, yeah ... umm, I mean, yes, sir.
Bill: "Fuck, yeah" is the better answer.

12:30 p.m.
Bill: I'm home. Hey, Markus. How's it goin'?
Mark: I read your blog. Can you get some blood out of clothes?
Bill: Sure.
Mark: You learned this from Reuters?
Bill: Fuck you.

Posted by Bill at October 16, 2003 01:20 PM
Comments

you are making jest of ME?

Posted by: stacey at October 16, 2003 01:27 PM

No, not me. That would be dangerous. :^)

Posted by: Bill at October 16, 2003 01:30 PM

Hmmmm...I do see some parallels here, this is all very familiar, VERY familiar.

Posted by: TW at October 16, 2003 02:05 PM

great dialogue - perfect

Posted by: btezra at October 16, 2003 04:14 PM

ROFLMAO

Posted by: Kathy Howe at October 16, 2003 09:21 PM

LOL - that is just so great. Thanks for the laugh.

Posted by: Michelle at October 17, 2003 01:28 AM

reality is really surreal, isn't it?

Posted by: the mighty jimbo at October 17, 2003 02:29 PM