Nothing But Love :: golf blogger

Easter Carb Bunny

"Write something original. I'm sick of reading about Bush and war and death and drugs."

"Okay."

As a public service to all of you who are on the Atkins diet kick, I am listing what I have found to be the carbohydrate content of some commonly-consumed Easter candy. You need go no further than here to feel better about eating your Easter candy. Please do not rely on the accuracy of this information to formulate your diet plan, thinking that I am using these figures. I am not on the Atkins diet and am getting tired of seeing that fucking sign with the "A" on it at restaurants and TV. Soon, it will go the way of the annoying woman on the Pier 1 commercials.

But if you are looking for low carbs, check out the selections at the Candy Warehouse, which claims to have "low-carb" candy. Yeah, right.

Here we go:

Peeps

1 Peep chick = 8 g (This is, however, a FAT-FREE FOOD!)
and, in case you go overboard, 57 Peep chicks = 1 pound of carbs.

4 Peep bunnies (and for you Peep purists, bunnies is blasphemy) = 33 g

Whoppers Robin Eggs Malted Milk Candy

4 eggs = 14 g

1 - 12 oz. bag = 238 g (I list it in this manner because it is a well-known fact that most connoisseurs eat at a whole bag at one sitting.)

Jelly Bellies

1 bean = 1 g (Actually, it's slightly more than 1 gram; so, if you eat 35 of them, it's 37 grams. Not being a pessimist today, it is a fat-free food; so, you could have Peeps and beans and not feel guilty about the fat.)

Reese's Peanut Butter Eggs

1 piece = 9 g (I will not eat peanut butter eggs ... something about peanut butter and not eating it sticks in my mind.)

Reese's Milk Chocolate & Peanut Butter Eggs

5 eggs = 21 g (Don't ask me what the difference is; I think that the P.B. eggs are big and these are small.)

Cadbury's Creme Eggs

1 egg (39 g) = 28 g (Cadbury's likes to think it is above all this, but it's not -- You pay a little more per gram, that's all.)

Dove Milk Chocolate Eggs

6 eggs = 26 g (These are those foil-wrapped delectable little solid spheroids of Dove milk chocolate.)

M & M's Mini-eggs

3 eggs = 47 g (The package contains 3 eggs that weigh 2.52 oz. total; at least they don't kid you about eating just one -- 3 is one serving.)

M & M's Bunny Mix - Peanut

1 1/2 oz = 26 g (Now, the bag says 1 1/2 oz is equal to 1/4 cup, but we all know that half the bag is gone before you start measuring; so, take that into consideration when you count how much you're going to have.)

Generic 8 oz Solid Milk Chocolate Bunny

144 g (unless you just eat the ears, like a lot of people are compelled to do, then it's like 24 g)

Snickers Creme Eggs

1 egg = 20 g (I think they come 3 to a package, but they are individually wrapped; so, you might burn a few calories by having to unwrap each egg before you eat it.)

Hershey Kisses

9 kisses = 21 g (Pucker up.)

Sweetarts Chicks, Ducks, and Bunnies

4 critters = 12 g (There's no chocolate here, which violates the Easter rule about chocolate, unless that pertains only to Catholics. You know, the rule says that it's okay to eat chocolate at any time before communion.)

Butterfinger Nest Eggs

5 pieces = 29 g (whole fucking bag = 174 g)

Nestle's Crunch Nest Eggs

5 pieces = 25 g (These are better for you than the Butterfinger Nest Eggs, unless you think 29 beats out 25, then go with Butterfinger. As nest eggs go though, do not pull one of these out when you want to show your future father-in-law your nest egg. Especially if he dislikes chocolate.)

Posted by Bill at March 15, 2004 08:36 PM