June 08, 2011
Mail Time!
I was excited when I saw a white envelope in the mailbox -- MAIL! Wow, I couldn't wait to see who sent me a letter! A letter ... it validates my existence. I matter. It gets depressing, putting the key in the little mailbox, anticipating what surprises might come, hopes being dashed.
So, this was pretty cool. And then ... well, it wasn't for me. I was crushed.
Matt has never lived here. How could the Admissions Center make such an error over there at Kaplan Career Institute?
But my day brightened.
Ms. Sarah Benko
Director of Admissions
Kaplan Career Institute Cleveland
8720 Brookpark Road
Brooklyn, OH 44129
Dear Ms. Benko,
You cannot imagine the excitement in seeing a white envelope in my mailbox. It is not often that I get a letter.
But my excitement turned to utter disappointment, bordering on depression, actually, because the letter was not addressed to me, but to Matthew L*****, who has never resided at this address.
I took it upon myself to contact Matthew to find out if I should forward him the letter to his office at an east coast university, at which he is Associate Professor of Computer Science and Engineering, a position he has held since he graduated from The Ohio State University with a Ph.D. in Computer Science & Engineering two years ago.
I am sorry to inform you that he told me that he was not interested in attending Kaplan Career Institute at this time and to take his name off your mailing list. I hope you will accede to his wish.
He appreciates the personal note you sent to him and indicated, regrettably, that he will not fill out your survey (online or by mail).
And he told me not to forward the letter to him.
Thank you for your cooperation.
Sincerely,
Bill
Wow, assoc. prof in 2 years? That's some career momentum right there. Most guys spend a few years as assistant professor first, don't they?
I gotta say, except for greeting cards it's been decades since the last time I got good news by the US Mail. It was academic acceptance too. I get credit card pre-approvals all the time, but they no longer bring the sense of tribal inclusion they once did. I use them to make sure the shredder is working. Which is important in case Julian Assange sends me something to memorize and destroy. It could happen.
Posted by: Kyle at June 19, 2011 01:05 PMI can't help wondering if Ms Benko will be as disappointed as you were.
Posted by: Anji at June 21, 2011 05:47 AM